Archive for January, 2012

Writing of books – escaping from reality or just using it?

January 29, 2012

As far as I know, the common opinion about being an actor, physician, writer is that you are not obliged to be at least a little crazy, peculiar and strange to be one, but it helps a lot… There are many evidences about this “rule”: while Miguel de Cervantes was writing his Don Quixote, he wasn’t interested in anything else but writing. He was so far away from reality that he wasn’t impressed a bit about his spoiled daughter’s behavior or his wife’s threats for divorce if he wouldn’t do anything for his family. As far as I remember, J. Adams used to get naked while writing some of his Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy’s stories (probably that way his mood would be the right for his funny stories). While writing, Umberto Eco surrounds himself with all sorts of small figures of ancient people to feel better the spirit of the time he’s writing about…
There are many similar events of the kind I guess, which prove how important it is to use one’s imagination while writing, but when the matter at hand is ignoring the reality creating a story, I would say: Quite the contrary! Even the most abstract sci-fi and fantasy books require a lot of the real life’s wisdom, or its “boring”, “dull” and “meaningless” details, which with a little imagination could be turned into an inspiring, wise or even funny adventure, novel, etc. So, only the one who never wrote a story would claim writing has nothing to do with reality and to create a good manuscript every writer have to forget the every day’s events, mishaps, joys, etc. For example, Jonathan Swift’s Gulliver’s Travels was actually a parody of the political intrigues and stupidity and strivings for power at any cost ofEngland’s high society from the author’s time, and because of this combining of fiction and reality I guess it’s still one of the classics. J. R. Tolkien also used some facts about animals, plants, which made his The Lord Of The Rings more real (remember that Frodo wasn’t killed by the giant spider Shelob’s sting but just paralyzed?).

Of course all these speculations are true for every writer, not only for the most famous (writing is a process that’s not much different, no matter how different the genre an author writes is). Thinking about that, I realized I used a lot of my biological knowledge to create many of my animal characters and their adventures, I used also some political debates, some philosophical thoughts/speculations from our time, etc…

I’m more than certain every writer could share similar experiences?                            

  

 http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ijJl-6Be88, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vkixN9Nr2Q – pigeons, http://www.allanbard.blogspot.com

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=263533&id=100000137216974#!/video/video.php?v=1297361605743,

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/ivanstoikov.allanbard, http:// http://www.allanbard.blogspot.com,                        

jokes/anecdotes to make your Friday/weekend, some not appropriate for kids…;)

January 27, 2012

Some funny jokes/anecdotes I found and I guess could make anyone’s Friday/weekend ;):
Answers of a Brilliant student who obtained 0% Q. In which battle did Napoleon die? A. His last battle. Q. Where was the Declaration of Independence Signed? A. At the Bottom of the Page. Q. River Ganges flows in which state? A. Liquid. Q. What’s the main reason for Divorce? A. Marriage. Q. What’s the main reason for Failure? A. Examinations… Did the student Answer Anything Wrong?

In a sex shop: I want a sex-doll… White or black? White. Fat or slim? Slim. Tall or short? Tall. Christian or Muslim? What’s the difference…? Well, the Muslim explodes at the end…;)

2 hookers are waiting in the street for customers, and 2 cats are making love on the roof above them. Suddenly, as the cats didn’t pay attention to anything else, they fell down. And a gypsy boy who played on the other side of the street shouted out: Hey, ladies, your advertisment is gone… 😉

If you don’t turn the light on during a date, you could save not only electricity but cosmetics too…
http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ijJl-6Be88, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vkixN9Nr2Q – pigeons, http://www.allanbard.blogspot.com

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/ivanstoikov.allanbard, http:// http://www.allanbard.blogspot.com, http://www.allanbard.wordpress.com

laughter could heal ;)

January 16, 2012

This post of a friend of mine at FB reminded me of my own pranks as a kid, when we threw eggs and tomatoes, or plastic bags filled with water, from the windows to hit people in the streets, or called strangers on the phone and turned a cassette player on close to the phone and spoke nonsense, or put lady’s socks on our heads with 2 holes for the eyes and entered into a lift and waited for someone to call the lift, or nailed the shoes of a severe teacher of ours to the floor, etc…;). A post that proves again that laughter could be a good medicine, so I couldn’t refrain from re-posting it…
via Allison Dohrman
WARNING…THIS IS LONG…BUT VERY FUNNY! THANKS =)

Why Women Shouldn’t Take Men Shopping…

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women – she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.

Dear Mrs. Samuel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1.June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.

2.July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3.July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.

4.July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5.August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

6.August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.

7.August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8.August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’ EMTs were called.

9.September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10.September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11.October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ‘Mission Impossible’ theme.

12.October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his ‘Madonna look’ by using different sizes of funnels.

13.October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled ‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’

14.October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed ‘OH NO! IT’S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!’

And last, but certainly not least:

15.October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, ‘Hey! There’s no toilet paper in here.’ One of the clerks passed out.

I guess such jokes could make one’s day ;)? If we don’t experience them the hard way…
http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ijJl-6Be88, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vkixN9Nr2Q – pigeons, www.allanbard.blogspot.com
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=263533&id=100000137216974#!/video/video.php?v=1297361605743,
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/ivanstoikov.allanbard, http:// www.allanbard.blogspot.com, www.allanbard.wordpress.com

some funny jokes/anecdotes to make one’s day ;) , no too appropriate for children, though

January 11, 2012

They say that laughter is the best medicine and I support such an opinion 100 %, as in the past I’ve experienced what it means to be saved by books and the good mood inspired by them… That was why I decided to post some anecdotes/jokes from time to time, which I guess many people could appreciate? I guess many of my friends will be glad to read them here, actually many of them encouraged me to do that regularly, that way more people could enjoy them and will deal better with every day stress, mishaps, etc. Not all of them are mine, and some of them are not too appropriate for children, so I’ll mention this in the beggining and in the title…
3 surgeons were talking to one another: “They brought me a miner cut in 3 pieces, said the American. I did my job well and now he’s working again.”
“Well, they brought me a driver cut in 5 pieces, said the Russian. i did my job and now he’s driving again.”
“And they brought me an ass and a pair of ears, said the Bulgarian. I did my job very well and now he’s the chief of our hospital… ;)”

A young man and a lady were travelling with a train in the night, the youngster wanted to make sex with the lady but was too shy to ask her. But when they went to their beds, he tied a long thread on his penis, dropped it from his bed to the bed of the lady and on the other end he had tied a note: ‘Unknown beauty, I like you very much, if you want to make love pull the thread once, if not, pull it 40 times, and let the last 10 times be very fast…’ ;).
http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, www.allanbard.blogspot.com

The funniest/craziest/most amazing/incredible, etc Christmas/New Year’s Eve’s events.

January 3, 2012

As far as I know, in most countries Christmas is more important feast than New Year’s Eve. Yet, I couldn’t refrain from pointing out New Year’s celebration too, as in the past Christmas was forbidden in all ex-communist countries, so many people, including me, have good memories only from the next feast after Jesus’ birthday.

Well, it doesn’t mean we didn’t have wonderful Christmas trees and nice presents, only that they were decorated and given at New Year’s Eve. And of course, we had some good, crazy, funny moments despite the many taboos of the system (though I guess they were less by a feast, as we didn’t have presents for Christmas). Like the vague now memory how as a five-six year old kid I usually broke all the Christmas toys/decorations on our tree just for five minutes (back then, here they were made of a very fragile kind of glass ;). My parents had to keep an eye on me all the time until the feast was over. I didn’t mean to be a bad boy, actually, I was just curious to play with the toys/decorations and have a better look at them ;). Or that I was convinced that it would be much better if not Santa Claus but a dragon with three heads would be the best choice for the job presents giving. And I even tried to convince the other kids that I saw her a couple of times (I thought a girl dragon would be better in this job ;).

I’ll never forget also what tremendous preparations we made with a friend of mine to use our first piece of fireworks (of the kind that beside the loud bang and colorful sparkles threw out many confetti). We tied it on a long wooden stick, to be away from the “dangerous” fire of the sparkles, and wound a couple of thick blouses around our heads, so that to be better protected from the loud bang…

This Christmas a colleague of mine told us that her five year old daughter decided to drink a lot of water the day before Christmas, so she would wake up at least a few times at night to go to the toilet, but that way she would meet Santa Claus exactly when he “delivered” the presents… J

I’m sure anyone could share similar experiences? Whenever and wherever kids are involved, there are always laughter, joy and funny events J! Events that could be more crazy and funny than any imaginary adventures in books or movies? 

  http://www.strategicpublishinggroup.com/title/TaleOfTheRockPieces.html, http://allanbard.hit.bg, http://allanbard.hpage.com, http://www.facebook.com/pages/Author-Allan-Bard-Ivan-Stoikov-Fan-Page-Strategic-Book-Group/121092637984053,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yw3a5n00FI, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qUA8Avl7ew, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ijJl-6Be88, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4vkixN9Nr2Q – pigeons, http://www.allanbard.blogspot.com

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/ivanstoikov.allanbard